Mike, my opponent this week, expressed his frustrations at my team posting OBP and SLG numbers above .300 for the evening. In retort I commented that it's only the illusion of hitting, because Abreu and Soto didn't play, which allowed their cosmic daily allotment of "hitting" to be redistributed through the remainder of my lineup, providing a greater concentration of hits over a smaller lineup. I then deleted that from the Google chat window because it sounded retarded, and just offered some boilerplate bitching about playing time and my old/fat/bad players being well-rested.
However, I submit the following:
Ryan Braun, since returning from an arm bruise on the 14th: 3/17, no runs, no RBIs, no walks, no extra base hits. Mark Teixiera over that same span: 7/16, 4 runs, 5 RBI, two walks, 3 extra base hits.
Chipper Jones since his Bursa Sac problem on the 11th: 2/12, no runs. Brandon Phillips: 8/22, 6 runs.
Carlos Lee since his homer on May 9th: 3/24, 2 runs, 2 RBI, 1 extra base hit. Carl Crawford: 10/30, 6 runs, 2 RBI, 3 extra base hits.
Geovany Soto since the 11th: 2/17, 1 run, no RBI, no walks. Bobby Abreu: 5/16, 6 runs, 4 RBI, 4 walks.
I think they're just passing it back and forth.